July 25th may not have been a significant date for you this year, but for 8-year-old Charlotte McCue and her family it will forever be a day when everything was lost. At 9:30 p.m. on that night, Charlotte’s life was taken by Alexander West, a 24-year-old man who collided with the boat that McCue and her family were riding in on Lake George after West attended an annual event on the lake. The unofficial gathering known as “Log Bay Day” involves the consumption of great quantities of alcohol by hundreds of boaters, most of whom are adolescents and young adults.
Reports state that after crashing into the McCue family, West and five passengers in his boat did not stop and went on to leave their boat at a nearby dock, all agreeing to keep silent about what had happened before fleeing the area. These same reports indicate that Charlotte received “major trauma” when West’s vessel struck her families’ boat hard enough to essentially drive over the top of them. This “trauma” was the result of the engine and propeller striking her in the face and head. She died soon afterwards.
As the father of two kids, aged 13 and 15, I cannot begin to imagine the level of pain and loss and suffering the McCue family is in. I do not know if I could bare it, and pray that I am never tested with such a tragedy.
And although I am not directly involved with the McCues, or the West family, or anyone who was there during this awful incident, the story has disturbed, and angered, and haunted me every day since July 25th. In my 18 years as an Addictions Counselor and 20 years in Recovery from alcoholism, I have heard hundreds, possibly thousands of stories similar to this one, where the results of using alcohol shattered the lives of people in ways that could never be fully repaired or restored. I consider myself somewhat hardened now to many of these heartbreaking and devastating stories, but Charlotte’s death continues to weigh heavy on my mind and heart.
I started writing about this in early August, trying desperately to say something meaningful or wise about this horrible, needless loss, or about how preventable the 88,000 deaths each year in America that come after using alcohol are, but the words and sentences seemed utterly impotent and useless. Perhaps because the permanent damage from that day is done. And nothing significant seems to be changing about the countless people who drink and cause more irreparable pain and damage on Lake George or in so many other places meant for fun and recreation and time spent with family in America. So why should I bother, and what difference would my words make?
I couldn’t write anything that mattered, and eventually my jumbled thoughts sat in a small minimized icon at the bottom of my laptop screen. Something would not allow me to close the work entirely, but I left it minimized for days, then weeks, occasionally opening the file and rewording some sentences, then hitting the wall of “why bother” again and sending it back to edge of the screen.
But recently I attended the first-ever Statewide Recovery Celebration in Albany which kicked off the start to National Recovery Month (which is September). Hundreds of people were there, the majority of whom are in Recovery themselves or who have supported friends and family members into successful Recovery. And there were many political figures and media, because the consequences of substance use, which so often causes these tragedies, can no longer be ignored. We simply won’t allow it. Too many people are dying, and the popular beliefs about many of these substances (alcohol, for instance) need to be challenged, confronted, and changed if we ever truly want to end these senseless and avoidable deaths.
So here is what I REALLY want to say about the problem, without taking my usual stance of political correctness and making sure not to step on any toes of the people who will shake their heads sadly when someone dies from an incident involving alcohol, but protect alcohol in the next breath by reminding me that “plenty of people can drink responsibly!” I get that – sort of. But it’s well past time to get real about the fact that alcohol is the deadliest drug in our society. So here it is:
– Alcohol is a drug. It belongs to the class of Depressants (just like heroin) and it is known as “the perfect drug” in the medical world because it can impact every cell in your body, unlike many other substances (like heroin). One of the first terms for alcohol ever used by doctors was inTOXICant because of the toxic effects it has on humans.
– Almost every decision made about the sale and consumption of alcohol in America has been based on financial gains rather than public health. The one decision that broke this rule? Prohibition. The decision to make alcohol illegal is the ONLY time in our nation’s history when a law was passed concerning alcohol that really took into account the horrible dangers of this drug. And the truth(s) about Prohibition that many people don’t know or want to discuss are that the number of people dying from alcohol-related causes in America went down drastically during this time.
– The number one reason that Prohibition was repealed had NOTHING to do with gangsters, speakeasies, or the majority of Americans demanding to get their liquor back. It was a way to rebound financially from the effects of The Great Depression (for more about this, check out the P.B.S. series Prohibition).
– “Drinking Responsibly” is a generalized, idiotic phrase coined by the alcohol industry which has no medical definition. “Responsible” drinking is, in fact, the last thing producers of alcohol want from their customers. For proof of this, take a look at any website operated by an alcohol company. The internet is their primary resource to reach underage drinkers, and the message on these sites is loud and clear – we want YOU to start drinking now and become addicted sooner! Because young abusers of alcohol make the best life-long customers (at least the ones who do not end up dead or in jail for killing someone else).
– The BIGGEST predictor of if a young person will abuse alcohol or other substances is the behavior or their parents/guardians. As much as I detest the drug-pushing advertising and lies that bombard the ears and eyes of our kids, it would be unfair and untrue to put all the blame there. What these kids see us do at home (or on our social media pages), along with the language that they hear us use when talking about alcohol, will always have the biggest impact on their own decisions involving drinking and other drug use.
– Alcohol use is NOT NEEDED to have “fun”. Fun happens biologically when neurochemicals (Dopamine and Serotonin to name a few) fire off deep in the Reward Center of our brains because we have experienced something pleasurable. It is a purely natural reaction that requires no help from outside chemicals. Think of children – in the backyard – with a ball, or a sprinkler going, or a large cardboard box that they have transformed into a spaceship. They are having fun, and the fun is perfectly natural and normal and pure. Now consider the messages you and other adults give these kids about how to have “fun”. How often does that message involve using a substance? How often is it alcohol? There is no doubt in my mind that the majority of young people drinking well beyond what could ever be considered “responsible” in Log Bay on July 25th went there to have “fun,” and that most of them learned early on from the adults in their lives that “fun” required alcohol consumption. If we could look at that one message, that one huge lie about this drug, we could start to turn the tide of destruction and death caused too often and by too many young people every day.
Because the reality of Charlotte’s horrible death is that Alexander West and his passengers are not, in all likelihood, the evil, awful, criminal killers that many people would now like to believe they are. They are much more likely to be young people who learned and then believed that they needed to drink to have fun that day. But their “responsible” drinking crossed a line on July 25th. And the absolutely terrifying truth to this story is that anyone of them could be your kid. Or maybe you. This certainly could have happened to me at that age after setting out for some fun and responsible drinking. Because alcohol-fueled behaviors often cross that fine line between awkward, somewhat embarrassing, but funny-ish stories and life-changing tragedies. And whenever that line is crossed, there is no amount of apologizing, explaining, or fixing the broken pieces that lie in the wake of this deadly drinking. There is just no going back.
Think about it: alcohol use is guaranteed to make every “bad thing” you can think of even worse. From personal illnesses to large social problems, the addition of alcohol has always and will always compound the trouble. Those early doctors got it right when they coined the term inTOXICant to describe the effects on the body, and the 88,000 deaths yearly from this drug include such grim causes as murder, suicide, domestic violence, and, of course, vehicle (and boating) crashes. Yet the ongoing, uncontested, insane message that our children repeatedly get at home and in the media is that drinking is essential to make good times better and that it also is necessary to get through the toughest times in our lives. Is it any wonder that we use the terms “addiction” and “dependence” synonymously to describe alcoholism? Our culture has become dependent on this addictive drug for the good times, the bad times, and all the times in between!
So that is my rant. It is out – no longer a minimized icon on my screen, but I know I will not forget Charlotte’s story – ever. Many people won’t read this, and even fewer may recognize their own contributions to the problem, choosing to deny, or hide, or ignore the fact that these avoidable heartbreaks continue to happen every hour of every day. But maybe someone, just one person, will recognize the power they have to stop the insanity around these horrible, alcohol-fueled tragedies. Either way, I will keep typing, and talking, and speaking the truth about alcohol, our deadliest drug, anyway.
That story haunts me also. You speak honestly and knowledgeablely about alcohol and it’s deadly effects. Don’t feel you don’t make a difference. You do. Light one candle. Lives are changed forever by this deadly drug. May God be with all the survivors of this horror.
Your points are well stated and certainly give food for thought. I am working with a group of “at risk” youth in an effort to give them a semblance of self esteem and keep them away from drugs – including alcohol. We are giving them opportunities to have the type of drug free fun you speak of, but in our school systems and society in general it is a real challenge. It is important that people like yourself speak out as you have done. I always figure if I can make a difference to even one kid, then everything is worth it.
As an aside, Charlotte’s parents were in a motorcycle accident the other day. They hit a car that was making a turn; she was in serious condition; I don’t know how they are or if alcohol was involved.
Keep carrying the message, Brian. Proud to know you! I’m blessed to have gotten clean and sober before it could affect my children, and I thank God everyday that I never caused harm to others.
To clarify (I am sure a simple typo) Charlotte’s parents were not in the motorcycle accident, Alex West parents were in the motorcycle accident. The whole thing is so tragic, I have know some involved personally and as well as some who work for me know the others involved. Truly awful.
I have never been a drinker. I guess I was the lucky one as a lot of people in my family do drink or have to excess. Which made me at a young age just not like the smell of it. My husband was a big drinker as well until he almost lost his arm in an accident. I have to say that was the worst day ever but the best thing that could have happened as he was the only one involved. And has not drank since. I hear these stories and think of my son who is 13. And I talk to him regularly about drugs. And how I know he will go to parties in the near future and if there is alcohol. He needs to be responsible and no how to say no. And always let us no where he is and we will drive and pick him up. We won’t be upset. And if other kids seem like there getting out of control or in danger to call us and we will come. I know how kids were when I was young and if you say know they will find a way. And I want him to feel comfortable and not afraid to be open with me. I told him I don’t want him drinking but if he makes a bad decision and chooses to that he needs to not do what is popular now and try and guzzle a bottle or take 14 shots. And I’ve told him the bad stories. And I just hope that he makes the decision like I did to not drink. And to help others if he sees they may be in trouble from going to far. I hope soon that they do get tighter with the laws on alcohol as I believe it is one of the worst drugs out there. Thank you for doing what you do. I am from lake George so this story hit home. And this child was just having a nice day with her family and was taken for no reason. Because yes some can drink responsibly but at this time a lot of young people just drink to drink a lot .
This is the best article I have read about that tragic day that has forever changed the lives of all involved.
Thank you for not giving up on writing this and for sharing it.
Thank you Brian for putting into words the cause of this tragedy.